Our Exotic Fish Collection
Babelfish (Babel piscis)
Instantly translate any alien language! Place in your ear for immediate comprehension of galactic dialects.
Price: 42 Altairian Dollars
Bouillabaisse Blob (Blobbus deliciosus)
A gelatinous creature that tastes exactly like the famous Marseille fish stew. Self-cooking when frightened!
Price: 15 Galactic Credits
Aquarium Supplies
Infinite Improbability Aquarium Filter
Cleans your tank while occasionally transforming into a sperm whale and bowl of petunias.
Price: 1 real probability
Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster Fish Food
Feed your fish the ultimate trip! Warning: May cause fish to believe they are the God Emperor of Dune.
Price: Your sobriety
Alien Encounter Experiences
Join Zarquan on a mind-bending journey through the cosmos! Our alien encounter packages include:
- Tea time with the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal
- Poetry appreciation session with the Vogons (earplugs provided)
- Hyperspace jumping lessons with a Hooloovoo
All trips guaranteed by the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation to be "mostly harmless".
About Zarquan's Fish Emporium
Founded by Zarquan the Vortex Dweller in the early days of the Galactic Federation, our emporium has been serving the aquatic needs of beings across the universe for eons. We pride ourselves on our collection of rare, exotic, and occasionally imaginary aquatic life forms.
Remember our slogan: "So long, and thanks for all the fish!"